Teary eyed

Last night I cried on the phone to my dad about my granny.

I was watching Julie&Julia and suddenly was inspired to do a little project of my own.

I think it was when I realized that me and Julie had so much in common.
It was the lunch with the girls scene that really hit a home-run emotionally...She was sitting there with all her friends who were wildly successful and she was just plain unhappy.

Like Julie, I am now 30 and not really anywhere in life. I don't have an amazing career, not sure I even like what I do most days, I didn't go to University until now, I'm not exactly thrilled with our house or town and I am certainly not fulfilled by my string of non-existing achievements which really count in the real big adult life.

She, like me, also had an older more wiser woman whom she adored - Julia Child. For me, it was my grand mother.

But then, Julie found her groove and it became a massive groove. Something that she likes and for herself only.
And I want that too. I want a massive groove too.

It was then that I phoned my dad, asking him to please keep my granny's things (which is in a garage in a box somewhere...if at all kept). I just wanted her stuff.  Her little scribbled down recipes, her little remedies for aches and pains and even her knitting patterns. I wanted it all. I just wanted to get my hands into her box, and maybe, I could turn out as good as she did.

I loved my gran. Not like other people love their grannies. I REALLY loved my gran.
She grew up strong, but she didn't grew up easy. She was the woman who picked me up from school, whom I could listen to all day. She was the woman who taught me to sew, how to knit and how to bake cookies. She taught me how to be a strong Afrikaans woman.

Her house was always immaculate, her spence was filled with bottled fruit, biscuits and other things we might need in needier times. Like the perfect woman described in Proverbs 31, she planted vegetables and sold them in lorry loads to the market, she made slippers from Crimpolene and sold them, she made famous Christmas puddings and sold those. She knitted booties and yes, sold those too. She was a handy woman and someone who did not fail at much.

She went off to the army and became head officer of the Air Force secretaries, then, after the war, became a midwife and was one of the first Afrikaans woman who learned how to drive.
Then, my grand dad came back and found her. They grew up together and always knew that they were going to get married. My granny said they never, not once had a fight.
I think it's because my grand dad came back an ill man. But they loved each other immensely and cherished every moment together.
They bought our family farm with the little bit of cash they had, and promised each other to always do things cash, so they will never fall into debt.
They were such wise and wonderful people. I've always wanted a love like theirs.

I could always feel my granny's prayers for me. The prayers of a mother and a grandmother are special prayers. They really protect children from the worst. The day she died, I knew that they ended. It was a void nobody could fill. But, I know the Lord filled her space with Himself.

I cried for her last night. She was my favorite person in the world. And I, I was her favorite person in the world.